I am a wholehearted believer of self-disclosure. I first learned about it in my Family Relationships class during my spring 2014 semester of college. I believe that you do have to risk being vulnerable, and risk even being rejected or judged when you disclose. You have to let down your guard, and it takes courage to do so. Then there are the milliseconds of breathless waiting as the person whom you disclose to takes it in, processes it, and reacts.
I know that self-disclosure mostly has to do with relationships with others. Whether with friends, significant others, spouses, or other family members. It can also occur with other people who have a position where that may be needed, like a therapist, judge, or pastor, priest, or bishop. Even to ourselves.
We all have secrets. Things that we have done or experienced that we are not proud of, or things that are about ourselves that we are not proud of.
Healing takes time, and it is all up to us and on our own time to disclose of such information to whomever it may be.
I believe that healing is possible for everyone.
Now I have generalized anxiety disorder. I take medication for it, and that does help, I still have to practice 'grounding exercises' when I get overly anxious and my thoughts start running rampant with "what ifs" kind of thoughts. Even though I have disclosed of this with my significant other, I still know that I will have to further disclose information I have further learned about with him, and to explain the triggers and how they work to him. I feel that when that conversation happens, we will be closer in understanding.
I still fear at times of what his reaction will be, because I am afraid of losing him. I will have to risk being vulnerable once again, and opening up and exposing the darker corners, the corners that aren't as polished.
It takes humility. I have returned from a mission, and even missions make you realize that there are more parts about yourself that you recognize and you think: "Wow... I am not as great as I thought I was..."
And its okay and normal to have a mini crises and despair and feel discouraged because there are all of these things messed up about you. The key thing, is to not let it ruin you.
I know I have anxiety. I also have Attention Deficit Disorder, and eczema. I may also very well have a condition were I can't, or don't produce enough sweat and my body overheats and I am more likely to get heat exhaustion. These make up parts of me. I won't be able to shake them off. So I learn to accept them and to live with them. And that's okay. Because I believe that one day I will be freed from them. Until then, I can help others who deal with similar things.
It has to take vulnerability. You have to take that risk and lower your guard. A sense of peace will enter when you do so. The burdens will be relieved.
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